Åsa M.: I enjoy every moment of life

Do you like your age?

If I was still in my fifties I might have said I liked my age. But I’ll be 70 soon, and it’s a little scary. 70 years is pretty old, and it doesn’t feel like it describes me. But as I feel calm and safe and, above all, I live alone and love every minute of it! I think it’s so nice to be able do what I want; it’s so wonderful. I’m really enjoying my life now. I had four small children at home when I was married and didn’t have much time left for myself; it was always putting out fires and doing this and that and going around trying to piece together the puzzle of life with all these children. So now I think I’m living a very privileged life. I can do what I want, whenever I want. If I want to eat dessert first, then I do it. If I want to sleep in then I do it, because I have the freedom to do it. If I want to be in the stable for eight hours, then I can. This place I’m at right now in life and have been for many years is lovely. I have become better at being a yes-sayer as well. I was always a bit reserved because I’m a bit of a lone wolf, but when people call and ask nowadays if we should do something, I say yes. This has made me have a lot of fun.

How do you prefer to live? Active or quiet, staying at home or visiting new places, shows, cinemas, etc.?

I live a very active life because I am a horse owner. I am in the stable every day doing heavy chores, and I’m moving all the time. I work in a theater so culture is also very important to me. Of course I try to see shows and performances and go to various events. However, I may not go to so many other places because I am quite tied to the horse. I try to get away a few times a year, but it’s no more than that. And in that case, I do mostly day trips.

What is family for you, is it the 2-3 closest people or a larger family?

I have a big family and we spend a lot of time together. I have six grandchildren, two biological children, and two bonus children. We spend a week’s holiday in Skåne together every year, a big group of us. I like being with the grandchildren and they usually come out here, because I live in a house. I also have quite a lot of friends, but it’s not like we gather in huge groups or anything. But my mother is alive, she is 90 years old and is extremely important to me. Then I have two siblings that I spend a lot of time with, apart from my sister who lives in Switzerland, but we often talk on FaceTime. But my brother lives here in Stockholm so we hang out a lot.

Do you have plans for the next 10 years, what are they?

No, I can’t say that I do. I usually try to live in the here and now. I’m overweight, I’m 66 years old and have reached retirement age, although I still work. But I feel very alert and I like to work and do not want to retire so early. And if you have a house, a horse, grandchildren and children, there are always things to do. I never think my time is enough for everything I want to do. And it will probably continue like that if I stay healthy.

What did you think of the term “mature age” when you were 30? What were your expectations and how far are they from reality?

When you’re young, you think 40 is old, haha. But now I look at myself and say, “who’s that old woman, that’s me”, so I do not think of myself as the age I am. Well, I can think of it to some extent, for example, that I have stopped wearing certain clothes because I do not think they fit my age. But the older you get, the more mature you become and the more crass you are. And of course, the body can feel a little old and stiff. But I have matured into my age and accept things as they are now. I’m still lucky because I do not have many wrinkles for my age. It makes people I meet not think I’m as old as I am. But you notice that you are not as alert anymore. When I’m out riding my horse, I do not have the same balance as before.

How can you describe the benefits of your age?

The advantages are that you are calmer and more confident in yourself, perhaps. And you don’t worry as much as you might have done when you were younger about “what do people think of me” and, “I look good enough, I have the right clothes, I’m fine in this”. I don’t care quite as much about that stuff now, but I just try to be a nice person. When I hang out with my close friends, we can have fun and just be who we are.

Do you like to travel far from home or do you prefer to stay close to where you live?

It all depends on how much help I can get with the horse. I have cats and a lizard too. But it is usually possible to solve. I have traveled a lot in my life. In recent years, I have been to the Bahamas twice and to New York. Now I plan to go to South Africa, when it starts to lighten up a bit here. My sister lives in Switzerland so I have been there. I was a lot in England and mostly in New Castle before, several times a year, because I had a boyfriend who lived there. If I can travel, I will travel far if I get help with the animals. Then I travel here in Sweden as well, but then it will mostly be Skåne because I have relatives there.

Can you say that you are happy with the lifestyle you have today?

I am extremely happy with how I live. I feel very lucky. I live well, I live in the country, and I love having a horse, it’s a lifestyle more than just having an animal.

What associations do you get when you hear the word “longevity”? What does it mean to you?

Longevity… yes, frankly, it means how long you live, or how old you get before you die. But it’s not something I go and think about regularly. I do not want to miss my children and grandchildren growing up and I want to continue living because I enjoy my life so much. On the other hand, I actually have a relaxed attitude towards death. When I die, it won’t be a problem for me, it’s worse for the others who are left. But I do not go and think about it, if it happens, it will happen. It’s not something you can control, you can only do your best.

What would you say if you could send a letter to yourself 20 years ago?

Just live, do not worry about how it will be because it’s good, it’s great! Never worry about things you can not control. Wind, weather, rain or whatever other people do, don’t worry about such things. Live for the moment. And if something happens, deal with it then, do not go around worrying about it in advance, because then you’ll have to go through it twice as my mother always says. So live here and now! She is very wise and has said many good things, and I really live by that. I believe that one should live and be blessed on one’s own convictions.

What things do you like to spend money on?

Hmm, what do I spend money on? Well, it’s expensive to have a horse, so there’s that, and interior design has become somewhat important. I have just renovated my house myself and it took a whole year. I felt it was time for a new one so I bought quite a lot of new stuff and replaced furniture and all that. But I don’t spend so much on myself. Clothes and stuff like that are not as interesting as they were when I was younger. Shoes are my passion, so I can buy them if I have spare change. Otherwise it’s mostly shoes for the horse!

Are you trying to learn anything new, like a new language, a new technology, a new sport?

Yes, I love technical things, and I work a lot with Illustrator and Photoshop and think it’s fun to learn more about that. I make paintings in Photoshop – I take old Renaissance paintings and put animal heads on them, or people. Then I prepare them and print them out so that they look like an old oil painting and then I frame them. It’s so cool but it’s hard to understand if you haven’t seen it! It takes quite a lot of time, so it’s a bit of my hobby to make these paintings, because I get a lot of orders from people who want them as a gift.

We all feel sad, bored or a little down sometimes. What helps you to improve your mood? What makes you happy?

The horse is always a mood booster. If I have a headache or come home from work and am completely exhausted, it is gone after 10 minutes when I am with the horse. I never need any pills, it just disappears. But I’m not really a person who is gloomy and down, but trying to see the positive in most things. I also have great fun with my cats of course, they are very lovely.

What can you afford today that you did not have when you were younger?

Today I have a horse, villa, car and food on the table, but I do not need anything more, I am a fairly simple person. If I can pay my bills without losing sleep, I’m happy, and I can.

How much time do you spend on the Internet and on social media?

I’m lousy at social media! I have both Facebook and Instagram, but have so little time for it. I do not feel that it is important to me. I have always worked full time and then I have the horse, so I come home and change and go to the stable, and come home again at half past ten in the evening and then I can not do anything more. It is a little different now because I work two days a week and have three days off, as I am on short-term leave. So now I have more time for my grandchildren and things I want to do, and am in the stable more during the day. Then it may happen that if I lie down on the couch for a while, I can peruse Facebook or Instagram. But I’m not very interested in that.

What food do you prefer?

I do not eat meat but I do eat fish if it is certified, so I’m probably halfway there? I eat quite a lot of vegetables and fruits. Then I eat tofu and quorn steaks and stuff. I actually eat eggs, so today I had an omelette. I’m trying to be pretty healthy. In the morning I eat oatmeal with raspberries, blueberries and banana. And then I drink oat milk instead of milk.

I’m a candy fiend, I must say, I love candy! I’m trying to give it up now because after the summer I felt that I gained some weight so that my pants did not sit so comfortably anymore, so then I have held back. So I’m actually trying to live pretty healthy.

When you cook, do you use traditional recipes or try to experiment?

Experiment I would say. I usually do stuff on a whim, based on what I have. But often I buy ingredients, so I know that if I buy this, I can do this and that, and then I stick to it. I can eat the same dish three days in a row. I do not care, if it’s only me, I will eat it.

Do you think you are eating a balanced diet?

No, I don’t think so. It’s not like I sit and think that I should eat according to the food pyramid and get all this in me. No, I’m probably missing something, but I can snowball into something and eat it because I think it’s so delicious. Quorn came out with crispy fish and chips, and it was so insanely good that I ate it with mashed potatoes and peas for a whole week! But then I did not want to eat it anymore. I eat what I’m craving. I usually think about what I want today, and then I make it.

What do you think you can do more of to improve your life?

I think I have a good life so I do not really know what it would be… no, I feel satisfied! It may sound crazy, but I am.